What is a “Wowchuk” ?

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The Wowchuk (Pudenda Magnifiosa) is one of the Northern American continent’s least-known mammals but is a creature worthy of greater study. It’s common name (The Na-nee) is a reference to its strong maternal characteristics. It is a small, friendly, social creature generally found in the North-Western region of the United States of America.

It ranges in height from five feet to five feet five inches and astonishingly is always perfectly weighted for its height. Many have remarked on its beautiful proportions, in particular its famed amply-sized chest. Contrary to popular belief this is not a device solely for attracting the male but rather one to house its large heart. Those that say that the Wowchuk has a bushy tail have clearly never been able to get close enough to stroke it for it is actually remarkably smooth and pleasant to the touch. The Wowchuk is a sensual animal and can be greatly pleasured by having its tail stimulated in this manner.

The Wowchuk is often mistaken for other animals which may explain why it’s appearance is often heralded with a cry of “Nice Beaver”. The Wowchuk Breeding season begins in January and lasts until December. It is perhaps this extended “active” period combined with its natural shyness that makes the Wowchuk such a fascinating creature to watch whilst mating. Many a scientist fantasises about being able to see the Wowchuk in action and video footage of this passes amongst the cognoscenti rapidly – the Internet is probably a good source of this sort of material.

Many humans have commented on how nice it might be to spend life as a Wowchuk. So where can one find the largest Wowchuk concentration at this time ? Well figures are notoriously hard to compile but the map below shows the believed location of the largest American Wowchuk warren. So if you want to find one of these wonderful, friendly, cuddly creatures – head here.

grantspass

 

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