Why am I so (trying to find the right word) irritated / upset / crushed / deflated (that’s the one) to have my messages overlooked on a random Twitch stream ? It isn’t personal, the streamer is just busy, but it really pushes some button deep in my soul. Partly it seems unfair every time someone else’s message is seen but mine isn’t, and partly it is that sense of exclusion you feel when others are part of something and you feel like an outsider. I am entirely aware this isn’t rational nor a proportionate reaction to what has occurred,
Tag: Relationships
A friend of mine was telling me that I was better than a hole in the ground full of water. A deep hole. With a bucket. He meant well. It’s an old joke, and very much one of my high calibre. But it illustrates something I’ve just experienced. A friend has said that she has faith I will sort out what I need ahead of my photoshoot next week. She said : “I know you will make it work. You are a perfectionist !” This is obviously meant to be a very encouraging comment, reminding me that I tend to strive
No, that isn’t a typo in the title, it is the Latin word for tomorrow. And from it, we get the word pro-cras-tination. Something I am very good at. Let me prove it to you. Actually, I’ll prove it in my next post, but you’ll see. (I’m funny.) Sunday mornings could be a time to get shit done. My dog plans are in the afternoon so I can have a lie-in and still get several hours of stuff under my belt before the physical-tireds kick in. However Bugsy was up to his usual tricks last night, simply refusing to settle
Encounter this morning as I am driving the wrong way down my one-way street, alongside a series of road signs saying Road Closed – two-way traffic, and a man driving up the road gestures at me to get out of the road : Me : “The road is closed.” Him : “No it isn’t.” Me : “Yes it is. There are Road Closed signs.” Him : “No, it isn’t closed.” Me : “I live here. I wanted to turn right. I couldn’t because of all the signs in the road.” Him : No. It isn’t closed any more.” He gestures
This is probably when I should be blogging – when my mind is a bit frazzled. So although I really want to be in bed right now, I am going to quickly type this. At this moment I am not sure how I feel. Not bad, certainly, maybe just a little “off”. I was trying to watch a Twitch stream but it didn’t go the way I wanted it to. At some point I need to reflect upon whether that was genuinely a problem, or whether it is unsurprising that a stream run by and for 20 year-olds doesn’t gel
The dog ate his foot the other day. No, you know, in the way that dogs nibble on their feet. I got some pictures and made a nice image. I’ll share it here. Since then, he has cut one of his paws slightly. It only bled a little but the wound is reasonably wide so I’m trying to keep him quiet for it to heal. The trouble is that he is not yet two years old and he doesn’t really want to do quiet. So it is the usual battle between what’s speediest to recovery and what is nicest to the
Okay, I have two good example of “me” and how I behave to share. I’ll do them as separate posts. For this one, know that a friend just shared a video with me. It wasn’t until I typed that that I realised the significance of that very first statement. The sharing of the clip was a sign of friendship but I had glossed past that onto a frequent worry of mine. I saw the clip and realised that it showed another friend at the first person’s house. This poked the part of me that says “Why do I not get
Nice day. England won the cricket; I cleaned the living room while they did so, so I feel good about that; dogs had a marvellous meet-up with friends as always. So let’s think about a tiny speck that rubs under my psyche all too often. Are other people having a better time than me ? When I’m chatting to people with whom I am friendly (that’s as much as I’m usually willing to say) I hear them talk about times in recent days when they have met up with others I know. Clearly I have no reasonable expectation to be
Actually, that’s a rubbish title, because that is a pointless task whereas my organisation has sort of worked out. Kind of. If you take a big-picture approach. Yesterday should have been the car wash thing but a panicked message at 6:30 before a weaselly phone call at 7 am made it clear the guy was expecting to have my car for an entire day just to give it a wash. Even I have too busy a schedule for that. So all things being equal the car will be seen to tomorrow morning (Thursday). I have been very mature and grown-up
For the past couple of weeks I have had a little house guest in the shape of my friend’s dog. The dog is small and delicate, unlike my two, but we have worked on her desire to pretend to be a delicate flower and she has shown her true colours. I think she has had a very settled time. She likes me despite the fact that I am horrible to her (verbally, of course, and in the most gentle of tones). I have returned her to my friend who is making excellent strides back towards good health. When I did